XiaolinMama

Do you have a theme song?

Day Two of the BlogHer 2007 conference provided participants with the opportunity to meet national leaders in health, personal finance and personal success. Thanks AOL and BlogHer!

Here are my recollections/reflections from the AOL hosted intimate luncheon I attended with world reknown author and AOL Life Coach, Gail Blanke. She recently wrote Between Trapezes and writes a monthly article in Real Simple magazine.. (which I love, BTW) The session focused on "How to create the life you want".

The group of 20 or so quickly introduced ourselves and why we were interested in the topic. From individuals looking for a new career, to women struggling to have it all, we all seemed to be looking for a magic bullet.

Gail explained that she named her book Between Trapezes, because swinging from one trapeze or life experience, be it a job or a marriage or into motherhood, to another trapezee, is where we are the most uncomfortable. However, it unlocks the greatest potential for growth and satisfaction.

As expected she was extremely dynamic and inspiring, here is the run down of what she advised:

• “How good can you make it?”
She said being able to answer this held the key to success. Basically, create a vision for what a great life will look like.
o Often it is not about information, but motivation.
o Create a vision that moves you and gets you out of bed
o She quoted Walt Disney who said, “Build the castle first, because that is where the magic happens.”

• It takes courage.
She was clear that courage comes with action – Courage can not be given to someone or it also can’t be taken away. It has been something inside us and we need to pinpoint times in our lives that we were courageous. Don’t wait for courage.
o Make a list of your defining moments. These are moments when you found something in yourself that you did not know you had in you. For example, occasions when you said, “Yes, I am/will” or “No, I am not/will not”.

• Letting go!
o Let go of the type of person you think you are not; specifically the self deprecating stuff, like the time you came up short, resentment and fear of failing. You simply can not fly between trapezes if you are weighted down by those negatives.
o Make a list of the things you are going to let go of – physical and then emotional.

• Your new mantra - Clarify who you are
Gail shared a story about a time when she was upset that she did not fit in at school. Coming home upset, her mother asked her, “Do you want to be like water?” Her mother explained that “Everyone likes water, but who wants to drink water when there is chocolate milk, soda, wine, etc.” You are your own flavor, so celebrate it.
o Practice saying and thinking “I’m (name) and I am the one who…”
o What is your brand essence? What makes your stand out?
o Then follow it by showing up that way.

• Put it into action.
o Create a Pyramid, with your achieved goal on top. Stand as if you have already done it.
o Write down the building blocks that helped you get there.

Her last bit of advice was to get a theme song theme song, something to amp you up and get you focused. Remind yourself how good you are. Life is hard and this can help you perservere.

Lately mine have been Joss Stone’s “Right to be Wrong” and Gwen Stefani’s “What are you waiting for?”

What is your theme song??

BlogHer 2007 comes to an end

The BlogHer 2007 conference is over. (boo hoo) Over 700 bloggers from all over the world gathered to hone skills, meet blogging peers and have a good time. As a new blogger, I had no idea what to expect or what I was getting myself into. I was pretty nervous, yet excited about what lay ahead. Here is the view from Navy Pier - pretty swank, huh?

I have been able to meet many bloggers who sites, I’ve followed since I started reading blogs. I have to say it was like meeting movies stars slash one of your best girl friends, since you have read so much about them, their experiences and their families. Attending this conference has been a defining event for me, in that I leave more inspired to continue my blog, am more clear about how to find my voice and am less anxious about putting my thoughts out there.

Today ended with an “unconference”, which was interesting and a nice contrast to two days of workshops.

While I think I will be processing for a few more weeks on what I need to do next, here are a few my take aways:
*I’m not such a newbie blogger afterall – but I do have a lot work to do on my writing.
*The blogosphere is richer and more complex than I gave it credit for – hoo rah!
*Monetizing your blog and holding onto your ethics and self worth is possible.
For an prime example of that, check out CityMama’s latest post (You go girl!)
*Elizabeth Edwards is one smart lady and John sure is lucky to have in his corner.
*Blogging is everywhere and holds the potential to change the world – at the very least, the public discourse.
* I love swag bags!
*SVMoms and Chicago Moms Bloggers are rockstars and I am really proud to be part of this very powerful group.
* The Lincoln Park Neighborhood of Chi-town is VERY cool! Thanks to fellow Filipina Moms blogger, MJ !
*Chocolate Martinis are yummy!!
*My kids and husband are great and I REALLY miss them – distance does make a heart grow fonder.

Second Grade Heaven

Okay it’s been hot and my son is not in camp this week – ugh! Besides hitting the YMCA pool this week, we made a stop at a hidden gem, Nickel City.

This arcade is different than your typical video game selection at Chuck E Cheese. Most of the games are included for an admission price of about $2.00. Newer games cost anywhere from 2 to 6 nickels to play Dance Dance Revolution and the latest shoot ‘em up games. It is perfect for two air conditioned hours of indoor fun. You can rent the b’day room too for a low cost party.

What do I love? The games of my youth – Caterpillar, Ms. PacMan, skee ball and Asteroids are all free! They do not sell food, so we are there to play and not be tempted by bad nachos or pizza. I love the air hockey table.

What do the kids love? Well it is like heaven for 2nd grade boys – virtually free video games and games with the prospect of prizes. It is small enough that they can run free without fear of getting lost. Where else can they play old school games, like Frogger, with mom and not have to worry that they are wasting their hard earned quarters on lame games?

It can get pretty warm and slightly stinky with all the sweaty boys running around. But for 90 minutes and escaping having spent $5.00 or so, I think it is well worth the trip.

Nickel City
1711 Branham Ln San Jose, CA 95118
(408) 448-3323

The Best Chinese Chicken Salad ever!

I spent last week with my father in law who was having glaucoma surgery at UCLA (more about that later). Since UCLA is my alma mater, it was nice to spend a little time in Westwood walking down memory lane.

Why is it that things have to change? It has been quite a while since we graduated, but geez, what happened to my favorite bar or my favorite post bar hang out? I naively thought Stratton’s and Santos would be there forever serving up $1.00 beers.

One thing that has not changed, however is the BEST CHINESE CHICKEN SALAD (CCS) I’ve ever had. Just 5 minutes from Westwood, I visited CCS central, Feast from the East. A campus favorite, this place has been turning out reasonable priced Chinese food for the Westside since 1981. Why is the CCS so great? Is it the crisp romaine lettuce, shredded chicken, scallions and almonds? No, it comes down to two main ingredients: dressing and the fried wontons, both of which are home made recipes. The dressing is light, not heavy like so many other dressings. The won tons are slightly sweetened always crsispy, but not like cardboard.

I forgot how much I loved the Chinese Chicken Salad, until my mother randomly pulled out their salad dressing one evening. I couldn’t believe that you could pick up a bottle of this delectable sauce at Costco. My mom lives in LA, so I took her spare bottle and went home. For months, my mother sent me home to San Jose with a few bottle of the special sauce since for some reason my home Costco did not carry it.

Well, low and behold, this past week, I visited Feast from the East in Westwood. I had the fortune of meeting the owner, Bob (a UCLA Bruin by the way); who informed me that they are currently testing the dressing out in Northern California Costcos to see it these is any interest . Halleluia! No more putting dressing in my luggage.

So check it out folks, taste the dressing at the Costcos in Novato, Mtn, View, San Francisco, Livermore, Concord, Folsom on July 29, Aug 1. Aug 19, September 15th. If they sell enough, then it will become part of the regular Costco line – just like the giant bottle of olives. If that doesn't work, Bob informed me that I could always order the dressing and wontons online. Why didn't I think of that?

By the way, Bob and the Feast from the East folks did not pay me to say any of this. I am a true fan. I promise you’ll love it.

Raising Silicon Valley kids...

I'm in Los Angeles this week hanging out in Westwood Village as my father in law is having surgery. With some free time on my hands to walk the streets of Westwood sans children, I have been thinking alot about what it would be like to raise my kids somewhere else besides Silicon Valley. How would they be different? More rounded? less tech saavy?

I've decided while San Jose is not perfect, it is a fantastic place to have a family. I decided that every Tuesday, I'm going post one item/destination/event that makes San Jose so great for raising Silicon Valley kids.

The first place that comes to mind is the Children's Discovery Museum. This is one of my children's favorite places. For years the famous dowtown purple building had the giant Elmo and the enormous Rubber Duck on its roof, making it a landmark for kids of all ages.

What I love? It is interactive. You can touch everything and I never have to worry that they will break anything. I love the Wonder Cabinet, a new area for kids under 5. This multicultural exhibit has areas where kids can sit and read and even make art.
You can bring your own food or if you choose to buy snacks there CDM offers healthy alternatives, like carrots. The snack bar benefits Hope Rehabilitation Services.

I especially appreciate that the musuem is trying to reflect the needs and demographics of our diverse community. For example, they had a recent exhibit focused on Chinese New Year and dragons. The signage in the Wonder Cabinet are in spanish, english and vietnamese.

What the kids love? My 4 year old loves the Waterways exhibit, where you guessed it, you get to play in the water! They even provide smocks, but I suggest bringing an extra set of clothes or waiting for this exhibit to be your last stop before heading home.

My 7 year old loved the bubble exhibit when he was younger, but now enjoys the new Art Loft and the Face Painting room. There are always traveling exhibits, which means there is always something new to see.

It is indoors and fully air-conditioned - an awesome option for a hot summer day or rainy winter afternoon. They also have a great gift shop that offers a discount if you are a member.

Have Fun!

Thank you SV Moms Blog!

Today I was treated like a princess and got a great manicure at the LaBelle Day Spa in Palo Alto. Many of you may remember, the goddesses at the SV Moms Blog hosted a contest for a moms makeover a few weeks ago and thanks to over 600 votes I won a manicure!

I met with SV Moms Chief Technology Mom, Beth B and Janet, who penned a lovely poem to make it in the final group. I'm still not sure how my entry even made it into the finals, but I sure am appreciative. It was such a great morning to chat with other moms and have a few moments to enjoy a cup of tea and admire my fancy nails. Beth B took photos and even took video for posting on YouTube. I'm not sure I'm ready for my on-line video debut.

Since the contest, I have had all sorts of folks send me emails with kind thoughts. Even my mom, who has NO tech skills, voted and asked her equally computer literate friends and my aunties to vote. Having them email me and make comments about my blog is priceless.

Again, thank you LaBelle Spa - I hope to indulge at your spa more often and highly recommend it! Special kudos to my fellow finalists and Mod Mom for winning, you certainly deserve the make over and are an inspiration to me! Thank you SV Moms Blog for this great surprise and thanks everyone for being part of the fun and voting for me and for all the finalists.

Are your shoes talking?

I recently joined two exciting blogging teams, SVMoms Blog and Filipinamoms Blog. I am honored and excited to be part of these two very exciting and different communities. I wasn't quite sure of what to write, then it hit me, well I tripped on a pair - shoes!

Shoes – my love affair with them began at a very young age. Being Filipina American, maybe it is the Imelda Marcos in me or maybe the Carrie Bradshaw? What I do know is that it is nothing short of an obsession.

There are countless books chronicling this love affair. For example, Meghan Cleary writes in her book, The Perfect Fit, that shoes says more about your “inner sole” than you think.

I looked fondly at part of my shoe collection and wonder what my favorite pairs are telling the world:

High Heels
In a previous life, I raised money for local non profits, I wore suits and dresses, which begged for cute high heels. On a non-profit salary, my closet isn’t filled with Manolo Blahniks or Jimmy Choos, but every girl has a few pairs that make her feel powerful. Mine are black and white Paolo sling backs, they match almost everything I have in my closet, so are dubbed my “grown up shoes”.

Brookes running shoes
I trained for the Nike Women’s Marathon last year with Team in Training and lived in these shoes for months. I loved them so much, I’ve since purchased 3 pairs. They are great for running with and after my kids.

Flip flop collection
I have 8 pairs in all sorts of colors and styles – ranging from the basic Old Navy $3.00 version to rhinestone studded to my brown Puma thongs I wear with everything these days. As a new WAHM (work at home mom), this has become part of my new uniform.

Cheetah print ballet slippers
When I need to look a little more pulled together than flip flops, how can you go wrong with a little animal print? My four year old daughter helped to pick these out .

Keen’s – These fantastic sandals are all purpose water shoes for camping, going to a soccer game and pizza out with the family. Except for the fact that you can get one funky tan line, these shoes are perfect.

My shoe collection is swiftly evolving from stiletto heels and cute office wedges to a new WAHM wardrobe hoping to convey to the world I’m hip, yet comfortable. Are there moments that I yearn to where the stilettos instead of the Puma flip flops? Heck Yeah! But I am finding that wearing my Keen sandals to the beach with the kids instead of my wedges to another pointless meeting is certainly making my transition into WAHM status much easier!

What are your shoes saying about you?

On the Goodship Lollipop

As many of you know I have a true ballerina princess living in my house. While, she can handle soccer balls being hit at her by her older brother and can handle a light saber with the best of them, my daughter's heart lies in getting all gussied up and get her groove on. Thus it was just a matter of time before we signed her up for her first dance class and subsequently she had her first dance recital extravaganza.

We signed up a The Dance Affair, a studio in San Jose run by the fantastic Erika Fairfield. Erika and her team are loving, patient, organized and kind, which is all you can ask for in dance studio. Most of all they were grounded. They were not under some delusion that all students were going to become primaballerinas. Erika in a very loving way creates an environment where kids have fun and somehow learned a routine.

Having never taken dance lessons, I wasn't sure of what to expect. Prior to the show we had several "Dance Outs", where the children performed in public at festivals, churches etc. They had full costumes and had to where makeup. Yes, makeup - brown eye shadow, red lipstick, mascara - the works. Kiley, of course, loved putting it on. I, on the other hand, worried, that I was taking my child down the path of Jon Benet Ramsey and beauty pageants for 5 year olds- yikes! What was I thinking... what happened to my baby? She is growing up too quickly.

The show, the 20th anniversary show, was held this past weekend at the San Jose Center for Performing Arts. We were amazed at the whole production. The place was sold out and the show was great! Kiley loved being in the show. She already picked out the costume she wants to wear next year. I now get why they had to practice wearing makeup and see that the community practices were essential for the kids to get used to performing in public. My worry about big hair and egos were laid to rest as I looked around and saw there were more moms like me who had no idea about how to get mascara on a 4 year old and decided to abandon that idea.

As for being worried that my baby was growing up too quickly, well she is certainly maturing. After all she put the pink lipstick on without getting it on her cheeks "too" badly. She is more confident in her version of pirouettes and arabesques and can leap frog like no one I know. We went out for ice cream to celebrate her big show. I firmly believe a scoop of rainbow sherbet should always tops off any important night. As I carried her from the car to the house, I looked at my sleeping little ballerina in her costume, smeared pink lipstick and dried ice cream on her face and thought, "I love being her mommy."