I have written several times about the joys and angst of my children playing soccer. I get frustrated by the competitiveness and horrible way parents behave sometimes and wonder what we are teaching our kids with examples like that to watch. But this weekend it all changed for me.
A ten year old boy died this weekend on the way home from a two day soccer tournament in Manteca, CA. My son and family are part of the same soccer club - Santa Clara Sporting. Jonathan Manzo Chavez, affectionately called "Pretty Boy" by his team mates, was headed home after the Saturday game. He scored a rare goal and was headed home to buy new cleats after a great win. Instead, their mini-van was side swiped and he was airlifted to Children's Hospital Oakland, where he passed away upon arrival.
The tourney was about 90 minutes from our home in Silicon Valley. My son's game was at 8 a.m. the next morning, so we along with other team families decided to spend the night in a hotel. I received the message late Saturday evening and wasn't quite sure how to tell the boys and parents on the team. Jonathan was one year older, but many of the boys knew him. They were all part part of the same team - the ones with the green and white striped jerseys. Jonathan's team chose not to return to play in the tourney the next day and every game held a moment of silence before commencing with play.
I admit there are times when I am totally distracted at games or practice, like I am in a fog - seeing but not clearly. I am usually thinking about the mile long to-do list I have not tackled, the dinner I need to make or the report that is due to a client. But during that Sunday game, I watched it with new eyes. I marveled at how tall my son has grown, how I could see the muscles in his strong legs and how he runs like a graceful gazelle - just like his father. He is not the "best" player on the team, but at this game he was focused and simply played his best game yet. I could tell that he was in his element, the year's practices had paid off and that he would not have wanted to be anywhere else but there. They won and are seeded #1 as a team with no one person being the star.
When the paramedics came to Jonathan's aid, he was still wearing his Santa Clara Sporting uniform. He begged them not to cut his jersey because he would need it for the game the next day. Little did he know that he just played his last game. It reminded me that as parents we get so caught up on things that just don't matter - a incorrect game call, complaining about how early a game is or winning the game. The boys however, just want to be playing. They just want to be out there with their team mates - goofing around, making fart jokes, burping and having fun. After all that is what being 9 is about, right?
As a mama, I have been hugging my kids a whole lot more lately. I have a new respect for a game that this ten year old loved so much. I have been trying to savor the moments of joy that I get to witness every day. Thank you Jonathan for helping to clear up the fog I have been in.
How to Help: Financial support and
donations to help defray hospital and burial costs can be made
electronically via a PayPal Account set up for the Chavez family, or
checks can be sent in the name of "Jonathan Manzo Chavez Memorial
Trust" (Acct # 376000010) to the United Labor Bank at 2550 N. First
Street, Suite 102, San Jose, Calif. 95131. They can also be mailed to
the Santa Clara Sporting office at 282 Brokaw Road, Santa Clara, Calif.
95050.
Cross posted to SV Moms Blog.
that is awful to hear! my nieces and nephews are very much involved in sports. one of my nieces has been hit in the head with a softball. one of my nephews had his two front teeth knocked out with a baseball. watching it happen can make your heart stop for an instant, but being able to say they're okay now is certainly a relief.
condolences to the chavez family.
Posted by: GEMMERZZ | November 19, 2008 at 02:55 PM